Castle Overlook

***FUCK OFF TUESWFRP PLAYERS***

First up, WFRP1e is fucking great - barring the career system which needs some fixing.

This is a little patchy but whatever

Roll 1d20+number of rooms visited and just kinda riff off the contents, letting things slowly get worse. Speed it up by doubling the number-of-room count.

1-20 is normal

21-40 is eerie

41-60 is strange

61-80 is weird

81+ is CHAOS

d20+rooms	Purpose
1	Guest bedroom
2	Guest bedroom
3	kitchen
4	kitchen
5	privy
6	dining hall
7	storeroom
8	dining hall
9	servants room
10	servants room
11	study
12	studio
13	barracks
14	library
15	library
16	storeroom
17	wardrobe
18	barracks
19	servants mess
20	great hall
21	greenhouse
22	childs room
23	chapel to no god at all
24	cell, sign of recent use - bed is a mess
25	apothecary
26	armoury, but all weapons subtly blunted and bent
27	room of mirrors
28	death-mask room - all of them seem in slight pain
29	single book detailing the current activities of Guy
30	single book detailing the current activities of Harvey Boatman
31	potraiture of the Emperor, with subtle deformities
32	family tree with many many connections to witches - if researched
33	collection of disparate diaries and logbooks and journals - victims
34	kitchen of rotten food
35	ballroom, but the orchestra pit is full of broken instruments
36	altar of sigmar, reversed
37	altar of taal, built of city goods
38	suit of armour in traditional style - full of rodents and insects
39	completely empty, bare of all ornamentation
40	servants quarters - but all bed clothes are under the beds, like they sleep there
41	torture chamber
42	surgery, all the tools blunt and cruel
43	horrendously overgrown greenhouse, signs of tending
44	jars of human hair line the walls
45	blackened crib
46	indoor pool, stained wine-red, surrounded by bottle of wine
47	collection of fabrics, patternless, and a box of blindfolds
48	just full of classically styled statues in mildly lewd poses
49	two legged dog with wheels endlessly circling the room
50	glass display cabinents full of murder weapons and marital aids
51	huge amount of drug paraphanelia and substances
52	mummified horse limbs
53	single servant in empty room, unable or unwilling to acknowledge your presence
54	dogs suspended on hooks, alive, silent, pleading….
55	iron maiden in room of overstuffed sofas and opulent cushions
56	BDSM torture chamber - but medieval and such
57	abandoned wedding reception, rotten bouqets
58	seemingly endless chains hang from the ceiling
59	bathtub with bloodstains to the brim
60	room entirely stripped down to the stone - signs of endless scratching
61	lab of glass specimen jars, all pickled foetuses and organs plucked
62	portraiture of the Emperor as a horrendous mutant
63	open casket empty, yet flowers are scattered
64	stuffed manticore , sign of wear on back
65	witchblood paintings
66	whale skeleton set into the walls themselves, bones scrimshaw'd
67	gibbet hanging from the centre of the room
68	ballroom full of skeletons, posed as dancers
69	human trophy room
70	human trophy room
71	human trophy room
72	human trophy room
73	suits of armour rent apart, posed mannekins having struck them down, bones within the armour
74	wicker cage, open, inviting
75	room of man-traps, all yawning wide, teeth aglint, stained brown from previous feasts
76	seemingly the front entrance - but how?
77	master bedroom - skin quilts, bone furniture, unknowable sensual furs
78	dark grimoires form an inpenetrable wall - all detail the readers death
79	sacrifical altar with all implements
80	jackson pollock but used to be human
81	pool of mixed in/human fluids, full of the damned cavorting
82	walls of screaming, pleading faces
83	pleasure-pit of wailing unfortunates and their whooping tormentors
84	the nightmare sea
85	a huge eye growing pseudopods, grasping for you
86	gullet of a warping-melting gential faced monstrosity pleading
87	walls are all pulsating slugflesh oozing and horrendous
88	figures impaled on phallic spikes writhing in ectatsy
89	tree has impaled them and grown into them, they feed off it's drug-sap thankful
90	mawed portal to the Ouside of the House
91	mawed portal to the Ouside of the House
92	mawed portal to the Ouside of the House
93	mawed portal to the Ouside of the House
94	writhing dancing pillar of meat made of loved ones, victims, eternal pleasure and agony
95	endlessly falling waterfall of flesh sensual and awful and utterly rotten
96	long chamber filled with procession of blasphemous monks - all are one, bound by endless vermicular tendrils sprouting from robe face, sleeves, tangled
97	people being cut down into the smallest organs and strands and rebuilt as new creatures, aware in pain moaning in ultimate pleasure divine blasphemy
98	room of half-people frozen in spotless ivory, all possible emotions and configurations can be found amongst the tangle of still figures
99	no-light area, antithesis of sight, all sensation is heightened to near inhuman levels - the ultimate hunting ground
100+	HEART OF THE HOUSE

obviously I didn't call it castle overlook in the game I'm not that much of a hack

yet

River Trolls

more monsters for envisioned Swyvers expansion or whatever - less of a thing to murder this time - maybe? whatever. Not 

RIVER TROLLS, Rotten Jenny, BilgeTroll, Bridgetroll

HD 9
Attack x1
+3 Smash 2d10 - those struck are flung 3d12 feet
-2 Flail - 360 AOE 1d10, uses both attacks
Defence 8
Armour As Decent Light (rubbery skin)
Mov as huge shambling mound
Init As long weapon
Morale 5 Bilge OR 11 Guardian
1d4 Bilge or 1d4-2 Guardian Appearing

All stand as high as two men, despite their hunched over posture, round misshapen faces low between shoulders broad, skin rubbery and foul, ranging tan-green to mossy black. All speak a broken half-tongue, yet seem not to struggle to understand men.

There are two types of River Troll - those which guard bridges, a task set by the invaders from across the sea. Then there are the Bilge Trolls, those who have abandoned their tasks, running rogue, flesh forever rotting and regrowing, despoiling rivers and wells. They will often build standing stones, marking territory and giving them a new 'bridge' of sorts - although pointing this out drives them wild.

Both varieties are delighted by drink.

MISTAKEN FOR
1 Drowners
2 Dwarves
3 Other Trolls?
4 Mosskin


RUMOURS 1d20
1  Bury a dog in the foundation of the bridge, and that`s how you get a bridgetroll. Remove the dog? Remove the troll!
2  Smell exactly as bad as they are.
3  Petrified of goats?
4  Filthy stinkin wellpissers
5  Cannot abide yew smoke
6  Adores the flesh of cats
7  Slumber only during full-moon
8+  Must be paid in drink

ACTIVITY - Guardian
1  Only allows passage to those carrying hard, expensive liqour, rather than the traditional [local drink]
2  Has been stealing stones to repair bridge with rather than requesting them
3  Bridge is falling into disrepair and the troll is getting slimier...
4  Local ruler thinks it very backwards to still have a bridgetroll, wants it removed.
5  Theft of local livestock
6  Destroyed something in drunken stupor/rampage
7  Has gone missing - please bring it back
8  Entirely disallowing usage of it`s bridge, has already killed someone attempting it.

ACTIVITY - Bilge
1  Poisoning the water supplies in the town, 70% chance accidentally
2  Theft of livestock
3  Acting as bandits of land and water
4  Continiously threatening violence if not plied with alcohol
5  Still attempting to collect some form of toll
6  Deliberate campaign of terror, general mayhem

LOCATIONS - Bilge
1  Just upriver of the settlement
2  Squatting about a tiny tributary
3  Beneath a waterfall in the wilds
4  Down an abandoned well
5  Important water resovoir
6  Moat of local fortification
7  Flooded basement
8  Local fishfarm/fishery

INSTIGATING EVENTS - Guardian
1  General malaise for a thankless task
2  Getting over failed troll-marriage
3  Bad mating season
4  traveller opened it`s eyes to other possibilities
5  being coerced by someone threating to destroy bridge
6  something stopping access to traditional source of material/booze etc

horrible jungle

***FUCK OFF THURSBRINGER PLAYERS***

I bought a Pomera which is a fancy japanese electronic notepad and it's cool

this is a thing from that which is barely even tidied up

would be statted for Stormbringer but I'm sick 

use your imagination

The jungle is thick and moist, home to endless poison blooms, striking flowers with barbs across the shaft, strangle-coils, winged lizards, apes of all sizes and predatory cats.

The bat riders of the Mountain hunt for rare herbs and chattel here, using the thermals of the desert to stay aloft, pig-faced goblinoids with lances and billhooks, their monkey-slaves descending on chains and scampering about, fleeing all danger unless commanded to attack by their masters, when they descend in a wild flurry of nail and tooth.

ENCOUNTERS

WHERE
1 - site of recent deadfall
2 - stranglevine infestation, roll again, 50% on playerside, 50% other creature
3 - ruins emerge from the foliage...
1 temple 2 "castle" 3 house 4 barracks 5 mysterious 6 unrecognisable
4 - a choked river winding through the maze of fallen wood
5 - the centre of a fallen tree bridging a chasm or such
6 - clifface in a valley
7 - crawlspace underneath fallen trees
8 - near fireant nest roll again
9 - near pool of waterfall pool
0 - entagled in the undergrowth, thick with fern and creeper.

WHAT
1 - Barkskin Halfmen 3d4,
  1) defending
   2) hunting
   3) curious
   4) fleeing
   5)ignoring
   6) sabotaging
2 - Half-intelligent monkeys 3d12, chattering and swinging, roll again and combine
   1)violent
   2)feeding
   3)socialising
   4)mating display
   5)friendly
   6)cautious
3 - Great Apes, degenerates of the civilisation of the jungle, some still bear stone weapons, artefacts of what has been lost. 25% entire tribe (3d12) else smaller group (1d8), of various purposes
   1 warparty
   2 foragers
   3 shelter-builders
   4 worshippers(ruins)
   5 "farmers"
   6 exiles
4 - Dream Tiger, and you are it`s prey. Can evoke fictions which are real to observer.Incredibly cruel, loves to toy with food, but loves itself more
defeat through vanity.
5 - batriders (1d6 (one bat each) + 3d4 monkey slaves) from the mountains, seeking SLAVES or HERBS or SCOUTING.
6 - carnivirious vegetation, prowling, using potential supplies as bait.
7 - stalked by vampiric bats, potential to carry some manner of disease, 1 large swarm
8 - huge swarms of flying lizards, all bright colours, confusing and dizzying
9 - Pirahana-equivalent infested waterway
10- Gigantic Spiders, weaving tunnel webs and watching eight times over...
11- Toad face, lower body a mess of slimy tentacles, with evil intention
12- Animate stone golem, weeping at the loss of their civilisation, brought
out of their black anger by a new purpose.

YOUR ELVES ARE BORING

cw - sa, child kidnap, animal abuse 

GET YER PDF HERE

Still working on monster hunting for a hypothetical swyvers (hence swyvers stats) expansion. This is what a monster entry would look like - probably not this layout though. That's just because why not

YOU CAN BUY A THING I DID LAYOUT FOR

IF YOU LIKED BROKEN SYSTEM YOU MIGHT BE DISAPPOINTED BY....

THE BLASPHEMOUS ROSTER

FUCK CTHULHU

WHAT'S THE POINT OF AN UNKNOWABLE HORROR THAT IS VERY KNOWN

The knife-edge of cosmic horror is that single moment of realization wherein an inky black vista yawns wide before you, utterly engulfing the entire world you knew and rendering it insignificant whilst being utterly unknowable by it's very nature - not only have your illusions been shattered, you're not getting a new one - this being the cut, severing you utterly, leaving you floating, alone. And that's pretty neat.

In the abstract our insignificance is relatively easy to grasp, but the illustration, or demonstration, the rendering literal of such a fact, is the cutting moment that severs us utterly. Survivors are wounded and left detached with nothing to cling to.

The unknowablity of the outside directly correlates to it's cutting ability - the less comprehensible, systemisable, the fewer links and logical consistencies it produces, the further enhanced it's wounding capacity.

That's why we need to stop focusing on the surface level aesthetics of cosmic horror, the recognisable characters and entities and forces - we're way past that point now. These surface trappings are graspable by anyone with an internet connection and some time to kill - both their fictive biographies and their genesis in the waking world. They are stripped and bereft of their edge, blunted for easy consumption.
comparable to how punks had sharp studs and now fashion loves blunt square studs. atrophied and nonthreatening, fucking pointless. PUN UNINTENTIONAL

Stop leaning on the old names and techniques - players/readers will guess Hastur! Cthulhu! Yog-Sothoth!, a flight from the actual simmering mindless pointlessness that cosmic horror attacks you with. What's more, they'll shit themselves twice as hard when you cut the guide ropes and push them away from the shores of knowledge and into the black ocean of the unknown.

Fuck 'em, let them drown.

I love day drinking.

Forgetting Bears

The mist coils endless, wrapped about trees tighter than snakes, ghost breath obscura. All sound dies in it's embrace. And so the woods are silent, animal cries localised, shrunk, extinguished. It solidifies to a wall when subjected to light, drawing into itself in defiance of sight or understanding. Bats slice effortlessly through the sea of fog, snatching small lizards midair as they leap from branch to branch. Figures cavort at the edge of comprehension, taunting.

From the mist emerge bears with bone masks, human fingers, fur russet, teeth needles and eyes bleeding*. There are always four - kill one and the rest seemingly dissipate into the fog of unknowing, leaving nothing but their slain companion. They meat causes Forgetting, a dangerous state wherein navigation through, into, and out of the Wooded Mist is possible. There is a standing bounty of £100 on a breeding pair of Forgetting Bears - their unmasked cubs would be slaughtered for meat, allowing the colonisation and harvest of the Wooded Mist to begin.

To capture a bear, a true Idiot is needed, unfettered by knowing or thought. They can grapple them by the mask, and hold them there.

FORGETTING BEAR
HD - 7
AC - AS LEATHER (DUE TO SKILL)
MOVE - AS SNEAKY BEAR
ATTK - BITE +2 -  1D12+3 + AMNESIA OR 2x CLAW +1 1D8
MORALE - 12 BUT FLEE UPON FIRST CASUALTY

*this said pleading on when handwritten but I typed bleeding so bleeding it is